Letters to Dead Poets

To Kshemendra,

You were funny. How come no one tried to kill you for it?

To Kalhana,

You will be surprised to know how often Kashmiris were bought with money. And did you ever talk to common folks on the street? You should have read Marx first.

To Lal Ded,

Winters must have been tough for you. But then, you do sound like a warm person.

To Rupa Bhawani,

You know they say something similar happened to Kabir’s body. And a few others. What’s with the flower act?

To Arinimaal,

Sad Kashmiri wives with stupid husbands always made good poets. Much before you, there was one Vikatanitamba too (Bad Mandal in Kashmiri for you. Hideous Butt). But unlike you she wrote really naughty poems. You know they say you never existed. Just a figment of imagination. If it is a consolation, no one has even heard about your husband’s highbrow persian poetry.

To Habba Khatoon,

This is a personal question. Now, I read Chaks were Shias. I know you loved him and everyone loves you…but did anyone ever question your religious beliefs. And let me tell you where he was while you were wandering around singing songs about him. He was in Bihar holding the Mughal flag. It’s sad. Write a poem about that.

P.S. Did you know about Kshemendra’s wandering heroine Kankali? She was quite a heartbreaker.

To Ghani, 

You should have locked the doors. Even after death they stole from you. Even Ghalib took a line

To Parmanand, 

Have you seen tractors ploughing the fields? Try to write about that.

To Mahjoor,

I appreciate the sentiment but you do know what happens to sugar when you add it to milk. It dissolves and disappears. It seems they took it too literally. I am out of the great solvation equation.

To Abul Ahad Azad,

I know poets, especially Kashmiri poets always had a thing for seven veil dance with words, but you could have been a bit more clear about your views on religion. With all this polarization, it’s tough to fit you in. And not a lot of people now take your name. Only ‘Azad’ with an ‘i’. Mahjoor with his birds and the bees is more comforting.

To Nadim,

Lo! Another revolution. Stop singing.

To Master ji,

In the last days, from your window, did you see Tawi or Jhelum? What are your views about antidepressant pills?

To Mahav,

Did people give you wet ones on your dirty mouth?

-0-

2 Replies to “Letters to Dead Poets”

  1. Dear Vinayak ,
    How can Ab. Ahad Azad find a place in the framework of present day exclusive socio-political scenario . A quot from his poetry is enough to explain the position :

    1. Shaan butkhanuk tae kabuk robe daab
    Bas nae az taani kaen'si vuch su Aftaab .
    2. Vatan manz chukh Khodha tcharan , tcharun rovmut panae ;
    Vaney ymi saeti yikh panas godeni kar soy nazar paida .
    3. Totheok yiman miani khotae chhuk nae timan yaad ,
    Preth kaen'si lagaan zahar yi nabad tae shakar meon .

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